A Poet’s 6 Tips on Life

Joseph Brodsky was a Russian-American poet who won the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1972. In 1988, he gave a commencement speech to students at the University of Michigan. The speech boiled down what he considered to be six tips worth sharing for the game of life. 

The first three were tips I was familiar with. They were stoic, kind, and practical. The next three were stock, kind and practical as well. But that was only after I had understood it. 

It’s not that these tips should be the only OS to follow in life. But they are good and it’s nice to hear from someone who is tired of thinking of doing what the young aspire to do. 

"Do I know something about life that could be of help or consequence to you, and if I do, is there a way to pass this information on to you?

The answer to the first question is, I suppose, yes — not so much because a person of my age is entitled to out-fox any of you at existential chess as because he is, in all probability, tired of quite a lot of the stuff you are still aspiring to. (This fatigue alone is something the young should be advised on as an attendant feature of both their eventual success and their failure; this sort of knowledge may enhance their savoring of the former as well as a better weathering of the latter.)”

I had to add the quote not just for context but because I thought it was such beautiful writing. The utter humanity that you can feel reading how someone of Brodsky’s age is tired of what the youth aspires for. God. That’s beautiful. 

But yes I know what I promised you so without further ado, here are his six tips:

1: Be precise with your language

"The purpose is to enable you to articulate yourselves as fully and precisely as possible; in a word, the purpose is your balance. For the accumulation of things not spelled out, not properly articulated, may result in neurosis"

2: Try to be kind to your parents
Rebel against those who aren’t likely to be as easily hurt as your parents. As Brodsky sums up, rebellion is…

“….essentially an extremely bourgeois sort of thing, because it provides the rebel with the ultimate in comfort, in this case, mental comfort: the comfort of one’s convictions. The later you hit this pattern, the later you become a mental bourgeois, i.e., the longer you stay skeptical, doubtful, intellectually uncomfortable, the better it is for you."

3: Forgive the politicians. Don’t get so riled up by them

The world is only going to get bigger as you live on and most of it is outside your control. So focus on what you can control. Also, life is a struggle for everyone so learn to have some fucking compassion because everyone is out there eating a shit sandwich. 

"All they or those can do, at best, is to diminish a social evil, not eradicate it. No matter how substantial an improvement may be, ethically speaking it will always be negligible, because there will always be those — say, just one person — who won’t profit from this improvement."

4: Try not to stand out, try to be modest

I was a little confused when I first came upon this advice. It seemed weird to hear a poet advise not to stand out. I thought a poet would need to stand out. How would their work be unique if they didn’t stand out?

"That you must step on somebody’s toes doesn’t mean you should stand on their shoulders. Besides, all you will see from that vantage point is the human sea, plus those who, like you, have assumed a similarly conspicuous — and precarious at that — position: those who are called rich and famous.”

But if you do end up standing out, don’t forget that when you reach a status of wealth and fame, that you did it thanks to the help of others. It would be a mistake to think it was just yourself. 

Let becoming rich and famous be the consequential result, the inevitable side effect of what you see out to do. Not for the money and fame but for the fulfillment of the work itself.

"To covet what somebody else has is to forfeit your uniqueness; on the other hand, of course, it stimulates mass production. But as you are running through life only once, it is only sensible to try to avoid the most obvious cliches, limited editions included. The notion of exclusivity, mind you, also forfeits your uniqueness, not to mention that it shrinks your sense of reality to the already-achieved."

I think it’s worth saying again: “to covet what somebody else has is to forget your uniqueness.”  

Don’t make the achievement of wealth and fame the primary objective. This is advice everyone gives. But I love how Brodsky goes a layer deeper to point out ideas of limited edition or exclusivity as a false sense of uniqueness. The need to advertise them as such makes them not unique. 

When something is made exclusive, there is nothing exclusive about it. It’s just kids deciding to sit around a different lunch table. It’s the litmus test where if you have to tell me it’s special, it probably isn’t.

"Far better than belonging to any club is to be jostled by the multitudes of those who, given their income and their appearance, represent — at least theoretically — unlimited potential. Try to be more like them than like those who are not like them; try to wear gray. Mimicry is the defense of individuality, not its surrender."

Instead of shunning those who “appear” to be boring, consider the benefits of it and also the innate spirit of it all. The freedom they possess of not saluting themselves to whatever clan their fashion and living choices now represent. 

5: At all costs try to avoid granting yourself the status of the victim.

"A pointed finger is a victim’s logo — the opposite of the V-sign and a synonym for surrender."

"No matter how abominable your condition may be, try not to blame anything or anybody: history, the state, superiors, race, parents, the phase of the moon, childhood, toilet training, etc."

It appears modern culture has failed in this regard. It’s all some witch hunt that transcends generation, applying modern standards to the past and similar idiotic acts that resort to ancient Hammurabi’s “an eye for an eye”. It’s primal barbarianism by those who wish to be considered refined and civilized. Oh, the irony. 

"The moment that you place blame somewhere, you undermine your resolve to change anything; it could be argued even that that blame-thirsty finger oscillates as wildly as it does because the resolve was never great enough in the first place."

All those people that think their gender or race means they should get some special privilege or some support because of some historical wrongdoing. Get over it. It didn’t happen to you. 

“...try to respect life not only for its amenities but for its hardships, too. They are a part of the game, and what’s good about a hardship is that it is not a deception."

Too many forget they aren’t owed anything. In fact, they aren’t even owed equal opportunity. Get over yourself. Embrace the hardship as is.

If you don’t like something change it for yourself by doing something, not by blaming others. Go play a different game if you can’t change the game. Just don’t sit and cry about how the game isn’t fair to you. 

"…think at least that by considering yourself a victim you but enlarge the vacuum of irresponsibility that demons or demagogues love so much to fill, since a paralyzed will is no dainty for angels."

6: The world you are about to enter and exist in doesn’t have a good reputation.

"The best way out is always through.” - Robert Frost

And to "get through” in this tough world, a helpful thing to consider might be to ignore those who will try to make life miserable for you.

Also, avoid talking shit about the ones that made life miserable for you. Remember that oppressors thrive on bad PR. You’re only doing them a favour by complaining about them.

Suffer through them if you must but strive to rush past them. Life’s too short to be around people who make you miserable. Remember, in a group of 10, two might love you, seven won’t give a shit about you, and one might hate you.

Ditch the one and look for the two.